Noisy because I live with three kids.
Where do you live in London?
I moved to Little Venice ten months ago and live there with my wife Sara and our two boys, Donovan and Sunny, and sometimes my daughter Anaïs.
What's your favourite restaurant?
Locanda Locatelli. There are Italian people in the kitchen, and there's the chance you might see Madonna.
What was the last play you saw?
Hamlet with Jude Law. It's four hours long and there wasn't one single minute that I knew what was going on. I was thinking, 'I know they're speaking English but it's just all fucking gibberish.' I can appreciate the acting and the way they learned all those lines but… what the fuck was going on?
What advice would you give a tourist?
Avoid Oxford Street, it's not like it used to be, it's just a cattle market now. There's no record shops any more and I always seem to be walking the wrong way.
Which shops do you rely on?
I go into Daunt Books in Marylebone every couple of weeks. My wife Sara demolishes books but I only buy stuff occasionally. I like boys' things, spies and the Cold War. Reed at Percy & Reed has cut my hair for years. I buy any clothes that fit me from Stone Island. Everything else I get from Waitrose and Selfridges.
Which is your favourite London club?
I've been a member of The Groucho for ten years. The snooker room is like a second home.
Which is your favourite shopping street in London?
I spend hours in Denmark Street looking at guitars.
What do you most like wearing?
A top and jacket from CP Company.
What animal would you most like to be?
A Beatle, which limits it. Probably McCartney.
What's the first thing you do when you arrive back home?
Download a box set to help me deal with jet lag. I've just got into The Wire. Then I watch Match of the Day on record. I support Manchester City. Then I'll get the troops together for a night at The Box - it's fucking good.
What's your earliest London memory?
I first came to London when I was 22 and working as a roadie. Having watched the News At Ten all my life I thought Big Ben was going to be massive, but I was underwhelmed.
If you could live in any building in London which would it be?
Anywhere in Manchester Square. I'm from Manchester so it would give me a sense of home.
Do you have a recurring dream?
No, but I have seriously weird dreams. I'll be watching Coronation Street and suddenly think, 'Fucking hell I was doing mushrooms with you last night.'
What's the most romantic thing someone's done for you?
About 11 years ago, Sara booked a suite at The Lanesborough for a surprise illicit rendezvous, just to celebrate the fact that we'd got to know each other.
How would you like the opening line of your obituary to read?
'Wake Saint Peter from his slumber, there's a little one on the way.'
What would you do if you were Mayor of London for the day?
Abolish the smoking ban. I've smoked since I was a teenager and now poor souls like me have to stand outside. What really annoys me is that in the winter we're all outside shivering, with all the squares inside, and then in the summer the squares come outside and it's like, 'This is for smokers, get back inside with your Birkenstocks.'
What are you currently up to?
Rehearsing with my band. It took me a couple of weeks to get used to standing with everyone behind me.
What are your favourite London discoveries?
I used the Tube once 15 years ago to go from Chiswick to Rotherhithe and it took me about a day and a half. But I've started using it again now to get to rehearsals and it's amazing. People stare but go, 'Nah, it can't be him, what would he be doing on the Tube?' I just pretend to send texts.
What was the last album you bought?
Sergio Pizzorno from Kasabian just gave me their new album Velociraptor! It's really good.
Have you ever had a run-in with a London policeman?
I was out one night with my wife and some friends. I was sat in the front of the car and they insisted on sticking their heads out the sunroof in the back like drunken dogs. We got pulled over by the cops, who said, 'Look, Noel, just have a word with the girls in the back.' I've always liked London police and had a good laugh with them.
Where did you last go on holiday?
The last great holiday I went on was my honeymoon with Sara in June. We had five days at the Hotel Caruso in Ravello, Italy, and we made a pact that we would eat pizza and drink red wine all the time [pizza & wine? pizza goes with beer...]. We go to Cape Town every January and stay at the Mount Nelson, which is a kid-friendly, old-school hotel. I've just got back from New York, my favourite city, where I always stay at The Bowery Hotel and always get the same room.